Here in the Middle

Leftovers

2009-09-03T13:58:00.000-07:00

Day 1

I, for one, hate leftovers. for the most part. there are the occasional kinds of leftovers i will eat. but most likely if it's a couple days old, i'm not eating it.

i've been reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan recently and just finished a chapter that talked about giving God our leftovers. what i thought was interesting (and thought of for the first time) was that God has the same feelings about leftovers as we do...he doesn't want 'em. how can something not be good enough for us, but somehow good enough for a Holy God who gives us His best and demands the same of us? simple, i know, but still profound. i can't fill my life with all of these "things of God" and then give Him what's left, which is usually very little. he wants my best. and He deserves nothing less.

The 30 Day Challenge

2009-09-03T05:42:00.000-07:00

ok. it's been almost 5 months since i posted on this blog. however, in an attempt to kind of be accountable to myself, i am challenging myself to a 30 day period of daily posts on what God is teaching me. since i know no one reads this, this really is something of a self accountability tool. if you have stumbled upon my musings, welcome. i encourage you to check back daily looking for the current day's post. if there isn't one to be found, i give anyone the authority to email me and ask "What's up?" for today's post, i will be writing later this afternoon when i get home. i would say check back about 5 pm for the first real post.

is there anyone out there who happens to still click their way onto my blog?

are you serious?

2009-05-11T04:56:00.000-07:00

so the battery in the Pathfinder was dead. i was stranded at school with no one around to jump me off. but what do my longing eyes see? a car coming! a student at my high school was coming to baseball practice. i signal him over and ask him for some help. he agrees and pulls up next to my car. i ask him to pop the hood and he complies. what happens next was one of those "are you serious?" moments. he gets out of the car after popping the hood. he proceeds to put his hand under the hood and pull. he had, however, forgotten about this new contraption under the hood called a latch that keeps a popped hood from flying open if driving down the road. after about 30 seconds of watching in amazement, i walked over and helped the poor lad. once the hood was open, he proceeded to tell me he had NO IDEA how to jump off a car and that i was on my own. lucky i learned when i was 12 how to jump start a car.

just out of curiousity, when did you learn how to jump start a car, if ever? this poor senior in high school had somehow missed this vital information.

the monthly blog post.

2009-04-01T06:19:00.000-07:00

i know, i know. i said i was going to be blogging again more consistently, and here it is, one month from my last post. so shoot me. things have been busier (is that even a word?) than normal trying to finish up school before spring break. 2 days. you cannot imagine the anticipation of these 2 days to be over. Karen and i will be on a plane this saturday headed out to NV for a fun-filled week in Vegas. we're also going to see the Grand Canyon, which i've heard is little more exciting than a large hole in th ground. (if you've been there, help me out and give me some of your thoughts.) however, i am looking forward to seeing that large hole in the ground being the artsy type that i am. i am already thinking of the pictures i can take. i think what i am most excited about is the chance i will have to sleep in more that 1 day out of the week. when it comes to vacations, i'm easy to please. give me a comfy bed and a relaxed agenda and i'm content. i'd much rather do nothing on vacation than have 1,000,000 things to do while we're there. hopefully there will be some cool pictures to post upon my return.

What are/were your plans for spring break, if you are fortunate enough to have it?

Mississippi Times

2009-03-03T12:49:00.000-08:00

i spent the weekend in Quitman, Mississippi playing at a Disciple Now. it was quite amazing. it reminded me of what students are capable of. i've kinda let myslef get into a rut playing at FUZE. it's almost become like work. this trip to Mississippi, although exhausting, has re-energized me in my passion for leading students in worship. i can also thank the "blizzard" that allowed me to stay home on Monday and recover from the weekend for my re-energization. i totally just made that word up.

thank you, First Baptist, Quitman, MS for having us come play for you, and rocking OUR faces off with your heart for worship. i look forward to returning very, very soon.

back for real this time.

2009-02-24T04:35:00.000-08:00

so i wrote a long time ago that i was going to come back and post on this blog. well, nobody's perfect. so this is really a post to more-or-less say that i am still alive and will be (for real) posting here periodically. if you read this, leave a comment so i know who out there is reading and how few there are.

peace.

I'm Back!

2008-10-01T11:27:00.000-07:00

i've decided to continue posting here on a not so regular basis. i would post on mine and karen's blog, but that makes it hard for people to keep up with the postings. that will be our "family blog," and this will still be my blog. i went back and started reading some of my previous posts and i wanted to continue posting here.

Just a recap of life's events since my last post...
- got the sentra fixed!
- in a month and a half, spent $6000 on car repairs for both cars...ouch.
- finished up internship at Mountain Lake and am playing there regularly
- started school at Snellville Middle
- currently teach at Norcross High School. go blue devils!
- engrossed in Auburn football.

i think that about sums it all up. i hope i haven't driven every one away...

peace.

doing the adult thing...

2008-07-03T06:24:00.000-07:00

so Karen and i are combining our blogs. i will post occasionally here, but most of my thoughts can now be found at:

kbisbell.blogspot.com

so check it out. Karen is a much better writer than i, and she actually knows what she's talking about most of the time.

make your move, Lord...

2008-06-09T16:07:00.000-07:00

i sat in on "meeting" with the upcoming seniors in our student ministry. david was inviting them to be a large part of the summer service, "fuze." it turned into a vision casting. and the students who were there grabbed hold of the vision.

God is getting ready to move in this city. we could feel it. He is going to use the student ministry in unheard of ways. i'm getting chill bumps just writing about it. you could see it on everyone's face. adults, students, everyone. God is planning something big. i can't wait...

Ha ha....Funny, God...

2008-05-19T17:03:00.000-07:00

I had one of those moments today. One of those moments that you just have to step back and laugh. when you realize that God can have a strange sense of humor.

we've been having issues with a Nissan Sentra that we bought about 9 months ago. what started as a "minimal" issue ($550) quickly grew to semi-not-unbearable ($1750), then finally rounding out at "holy crap! that's half the cost of the car!" ($4000) in the span of about 4 days. i got that call today from the mechanic. at first, as you can imagine, i went into panic mode and almost had a breakdown...only to have time to cool off and think rationally about the situation. "God's got it. He's bigger than my car problems...we still have a great car (Pathfinder) that works..."

I walk out of school to get in my car only to find that i have a flat tire. i don't know if it was nerves, or sheer irony, or what, but i just started laughing.

"Thanks, Dad."

teach by grace

2008-03-05T12:40:00.000-08:00

i was sitting in a meeting last week. nothing exciting, just a normal weekly CAT meeting with all the other connections teachers. the topic of our dress code came up, which is a touchy subject around here. i work in Snellville, GA, and just by driving through the city, you can see the culture that is alive here. the thing we fight the most is saggy pants. it is the style of the day for the young men to sag their pants below their butts at times. this is against our dress code. it is inappropriate and honestly, the students who do this look like thugs. so this is what we are discussing in our meeting.

i work with several older generation teachers, some of which are on their way to retirement. it is my impression that these teachers are the "strict disciplinarian" type teachers who are used to keeping students "under their thumb." of course they were ranting and raving about the current trend of the saggy pants and the blatant disregard for rules the students show by sagging. i started thinking about how the students respond to these teachers and their discipline tactics. i also thought about my first nine weeks, and how i tried to use this disciplinary approach. the students did't respond to this. in talking to one of my eighth grade classes (one of my worst to date) about the discipline at our school. i asked them if there was any consequence at our school that they "feared." their answer was a resounding no. they don't care if they get suspended, because they get to make up the work when they get back. they don't care about referrals, because those only lead to suspensions. they don't care about conduct cuts because those only lead to referrals. do you see why they don't care? no "real" consequence. so i changed my approach to discipline: i began to give grace.

i no longer give conduct cuts and referrals. if there is a situation that i must deal with, i talk to the student about it. this builds relationships. the relationship builds respect. it's my belief that the paradigm of our students is changing. the days of stern discipline procedures, i believe, are gone. students don't respond to that. they clam up and shut you out. (some students will do this anyway, but you can't win 'em all.) i have found that students respond really well to this approach. students are actually talking to me about things other than health stuff. i had a student stop me in the hall yesterday to tell me he was being panelled, which means he might be expelled from school for a year. this is one of my "at-risk" students who i initally started my grace approach with. he doesn't talk to any teacher other than to make a smart aleck comment or something. i got to talk to this student about the decision he made that led him to his panel. all brought about by a relationship built through grace.

i wondered if the "staunch disciplinarian" paradigm will ever disappear as the student populus changes. we'll see...

church at starbucks?

2008-02-15T06:28:00.000-08:00

starbucks has it right. i went into one this morning on my way to school. karen wasn't feeling well, and a white chocolate mocha always helps her feel better. it was really busy in there this morning, and i sank into my normal impatient state. but looking past my disgruntled state of mind, i began to pick up on something: everyone knew each other. Customers, baristas, everyone. they cam in, got in line, and began talking to all the other people in the store. the lady behind me to the lady in front of me: "they must be selling gold in here, because it's never this busy!"

lady in front of me: "i know. i know i'm late when it's this busy. how was your Valentines's day, Jill?"

"it was great! the kids make it better. you know the kids, right?"

and this carried on the entire time we were in line. then i started noticing the exchanges between the customers and the baristas. it was the same thing. asking about the kids, how the week had been going, and calling each other by name.

after i got back in the car and dove into the decadent beverage that is a white chocolate mocha, i began to think: what makes stabucks the giant among coffee companies? drive through any major city and you'll see one on every block, sometimes even closer together than that. and it's not overkill. that many are needed to sustain the demand. what is driving this company to dwarf all other coffee companies (besides the fact that America runs on coffee and is addicted to the caffeine)? why are people choosing starbucks over every other store. then it hit me.

community.

each starbuck is like its own little family. the baristas know the customers. not just their faces, but their stories. the customers know each other. and their families.

in talking to a friend of mine that works at a starbucks, i've learned that this is starbucks' intent. they hire baristas who are personable and will get to know their customers. i've seena poster in a starbucks bathroom that had several different blurbs by baristas talking about some of their regular customers. so why is this appealing?

people need a place to belong. a place where, as the "Cheers" song says, "everybody knows your name." there is an inate longing in each of us to have a place to call home away from home. where people accept you where you are. God himself even had this in the Trinity. starbucks is that place by design.

as i processed this thought, i wondered why so many churches miss this when a secular COFFEE COMPANY is using the idea to perfection. i then took it a little further. what would our middle and high schools look like if the teachers cared enough to cultivate this kind of idea into the regular curriculum? how much different would our youth look with a place they belong AT SCHOOL? i am praying that God will continue to cultivate this thought in me as i interact with my middle schoolers. who better to give a place to belong than a "searching for who i am" middle schooler?

well, at least they could find it in starbucks.

"...nothing good comes from Nazareth!"

2008-01-14T06:53:00.000-08:00

the words of Nathanael in response to Phillip telling him that "they had found Jesus of Nazeareth, the one the prophets wrot about." this gives me the impression that Nazareth was like a modern day ghetto. a place where no good came from. whereno one wanted to be.

how cool is it that this is where our Savior is from? the ghetto! the place of common people. the place of no good. thank you Jesus, for making yourself accessible for common folk.

where'd everybody go?

2008-01-08T09:24:00.000-08:00

i guess i did it to myself, but no one looks at my blog anymore. no comments. it's very sad. but i guess that's what happens when you blog twice a year or so. leave a comment to boost my morale.

pink eye

2008-01-02T11:49:00.000-08:00

i woke up this morning with pink eye. i haven't had that since i was little. i must admit...it's pretty miseable. i feel like i've been punched in the eye, i look like i haven't slept in a month my eye is so red, and i am constantly wiping green goop from my eye. i don't remember having this when i was little, but i can't imagine how much it had to have sucked. if it sucks this bad at 23, it must feel like the end of the world to a 8 year old.

boo for pink eye.

another one goes home

2007-12-20T05:44:00.000-08:00

I found out this week that another of my High School class mates has passed away. In the 6 years since we graduated, we have lost 2 of our small class of 21; one, whom i was in school with for 13 years, to a tragic car accident; and the other, whom i only knew for 4 years, to a sudden and unexplained illness. I had not seen either of these friends of mine in more than 3 years at the time of their deaths, but i still hurt. I hurt for the families. i hurt for the friends. i hurt for the fiance that was left behind with no explanation of why he would never marry the love of his life. even now, in this moment, i feel the pain of all those left with no answers. i have the assurance of knowing that i WILL see these two again. even as little as i may have known them, i know they are worshiping eternally in their true home. it leaves me to pray for those i did not know about. the other 18 of my senior class mates whom i am not sure of their relationship with God. it also helps me to appreciate the students i am now teaching. i must be more aware of their spiritual need. not to "save" them, but to introduce them to the Man who has changed my life forever. to give them the same hope that i have in the One who knows us better than ourselves. to show them that they matter on this earth.

welcome home Toby and Melissa.

wow...

2007-06-28T16:34:00.000-07:00

well, it's been a while again. a lot has happened since the last post. we're moving to north GA in a few weeks. I'm getting a teaching job, and Karen will be working for a non-profit organization we're starting up. we'll probably blog more about that soon. There is an awesome church in Cumming that we're getting involved with. it's a new church that has a great vision for the people of the community. we're really excited about the move. this was quick, but more will come, hopefully before 5 months from now.

6 months in the making

2007-02-06T06:40:00.000-08:00

wow. the last time i blogged, we had just decided on a band name. seems like forever ago. hopefully, there are still a faithful few who continue to look at my blog. i probably ran everyone off, but it doesn't hurt to try does it? i dont' really know what to write. Karen and i are about to hit the one year mark...holy cow. we are trying to figure out what we are going to do with aur lives. so the title of my blog still holds true. stuck here in the middle of the directions God is leading us. we have closed a chapter of our lives (auburn) and are waiting to open the next (who knows what). we really have little idea what God has in store for us. we know that seminary for Karen is a possibility and we are working towards that. we also know that music is an avenue for me. so...still clueless. one thing i do know is that this is a time of preparation for whatever the future holds.

how's everyone doing out there in bloggerland?

band name

2006-09-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

we are no longer the band without a name. we have finally decided on something, and it's getting the approval of many. the first few we decided on had opposition from many people, but this one has had nothing but positive feedback. it has no meaning as of now, but i think it could. the name for the band yet to be named is:

AFTERFALL

www.myspace.com/afterfallband

enjoy

just because

2006-08-15T15:07:00.000-07:00

i always get flack for not updating, so i did. check karen's blog (karenecorwin.blogspot.com) for pics of our awesome dog bailey. he's the best

for meagan maki, and everyone else who is so faithful to check this rarely updated blog

2006-07-17T12:42:00.000-07:00

your comment made me laugh, so i thought i would post to appease the masses. not a whole lot to report. we're moving in next to david and farah, who called us crazy. i don't think we're crazy. "the band" that is nameless is moving ahead. we're knocking out some of my songs, and getting them really good. i'm really excited about that. i'm about 2 weeks away from graduating from college, which is so awesome that words don't come close to describing the greatness of it. and i'm really falling in love with jesus all over again. i've really been living a boring lifeless existence lately, and he woke me up to this fact here recently. i'm missing out on the abundant life that he has and the relationship that he offers. i laid awake in bed last night chewing on the mediocraty that i have been settling for. i can't wait to see where he takes me.

my monthly blog post...

2006-05-04T09:26:00.000-07:00

Well, it's that time again! time to post my monthly update. it's a little sooner than usual, but that's ok.
I'm done with my internship. i have only one more class to take in the summer. i graduate in 3 months (august 7). this is getting really close. i can taste it. i want to be out of here soooo bad, but i have to pass this class. then, it's out into the real world. no longer a student. a graduate. with a degree. probably that i'll never use. i loved my major, and i don't think i would have done anything else, but i couldn't do it for a living. i would get way too burned out way too quickly.
i found myself "using" God. i would spend time with him when i wanted to write a song. it was dumb. i didn't seek him with all my heart, and guess what...i didn't find him. i realized what i was doing and immediately thought of how dumb it was. i need to be seeking who i am writing the songs about, not the song itself. i got way to caught up in that. he has shown me that when i lead worship, it is best to let him pick the songs, rather than me. it is him we are singing to, and he probably has certain songs that he would like to hear at certain times. so i moved myself completely out of the way. from picking the songs, to playing the music, to singing. i have nothing to do with it. it's all him. (thank the Lord for that.)

I gotta get better at this...

2006-04-22T08:04:00.000-07:00

Wow. it's been over a mpnth and a half since i've posted anything. if you are still checking to see if i'm posting, thank you, but i've probably run every one off. well, a lot has happened in the past month and a half. i'll make a list:

1.) I got married on March 11
2.) Karen and I decided not to go on staff in auburn in august
3.) i made a demo (you can hear 2 of the songs at my Myspace:: www.myspace.com/bryanisbell)
4.) I'm in a band
5.) i've decided to move (Possibly) to North Carolina
6.) I'm "touring" this summer, depending on if anyone wants me to come
7.) I started working back at hibbett
8.) I'm alsmost done with my internship
9.) i started teaching guitar lessons

and i can't think of the numerous other things that are swirling in my head.
It's been a busy time. because of that, my time with the Father has been limited. But something he has taught me and that i am clinging to is that he has me firmly in his hand, and all i can do is follow his leading. so we shall see where the road has for me and MY WIFE (that's still kinda weird!).

for those who continue to check...

2006-03-01T06:57:00.000-08:00

it's been almost 2 months since i've posted anything. let's just say things have been a little busy with the wedding stuff (which is happening in 10 DAYS!!!) and internship stuff and things of that nature. but, i found some time to humor those of you who may check this blog periodically.
i'm getting married in 10 days...oh my gah!!! i can't belive that it is actually here. words can't express the emotions or the feelings that that i;m going through right now. it's not a nervous feeling because it feels right and peaceful, and it's not a "holy crap"feeling like a "what am i getting myself into feeling". it's very surreal, and i don't know if has fully set in yet. it my not until i'm driving away from Marengo, with my WIFE sitting next to me in the car on the way to the hotel that we are staying at TOGETHER and it be okay. wow...that is so strange...

more to come...
bryan

and finally...

2006-01-17T16:01:00.000-08:00

to the request of many (ok, maybe only three) i am posting a new blog. so karen, farah and dylan, see, read, and be merry.
i realized recently how in the dark i really am. i had been believing several lies that the enemy threw at me, and i had been fitted with a nice pair of blinders. i could not see what was hitting me. however, by the grace and love and mercy and power of God, my blindness has been healed. i can now see the falseness of the stuff that i was being fed. in looking at the past year or so, i see the damage that this life i've lived has left. let the road to healing begin!
i hold fast to the promise that the LORD is the refuge for the weary and (to use a bible term) heavy laden.

"I look to the hills, where does my help come from? my help comes from the lord!"
-Somewhere in Psalms

peace

Merry Christmas!!!

2005-12-25T21:42:00.000-08:00

i hope that the Christmas season is going well for all of those who may be reading. what is freedom? what does it look like? where does it come from? these are questions i find myself asking...myself and pondering the answer to them. i struggle with the idea of freedom. i know that i am free, but, somehow i always end up in the shackels again. i have dificulty claiming that freedom for myself. i had come to a point that i believed that i had it nailed, only to realize that i was the one being nailed back to the prison wall. the idea of true freedom has eluded me...and yet it hasn't. this is making absolutely no sense to me, but i know that it will. to be free is to embrace the sacrifice that has been made on my behalf. to live in bondage is to mock this sacrifice and deem it unworthy of me. but it's all backwards. i am unworhty of the gift. the gift of grace is something i neither meritted nor deserve. yet it is freely given. to grasp on to this is to forsake all that is known to me and run in the direction of the Father's voice. thank you, Daddy, for this gift of grace that i am not worthy of.

peace out

what's happenin'

2005-12-19T23:33:00.000-08:00

It's been a while since i've blogged. it's kinda discouraging to me that no one ever leaves comments on my blog. does nobody read it, or do they simply refuse to comment? i had to beg Karen to leave me a comment so that i wasn't a comment loser anymore...oh well. if you're reading this, humor me a little adnd take a few seconds to leave me a comment...or don't, which ever works for you.
i'm getting married...that's so cool!!! we are moving Karen into OUR house tomorrow. i'm so pumped! let me just say that God is good in His provision for His children. i never have a need that is left dry. even in my unfaithfulness, He is faithful.
Karen and i are raising our support to go on staff with Grace. it has definately been a trying experience so far, not knowing how in the world we were going to raise all the money in the right amount of time. But, as mentioned above, God is faithful, moreso than i will ever be able to fathom. He has, in only a short amount of time, provided several people that are wanting to partner with us, with the hope of more to come. it is a really cool place to be, allowing God to provide ALL of your financial needs. i will be the first to tell you that i struggle with the idea of giving up control of my finances, especially when i'm about to get married with the pressures of the world telling me that i have to have all my ducks in a row and be "the breadwinning, successful man." it's cool and kinda scary to know that it's not in my hands. whoa...this is so much longer than i ever thought i would blog. the little scroll bar just came into the post box...well i leave you with this: who better to trust with your money than the One who has all the money in the world?

the best thanksgiving ever! (well, sort of...)

2005-11-29T20:37:00.000-08:00

so...i spent thanksgiving in the carribean. while most americans were eating turkey in the cold november air, i was in a bathing suit snorkeling on the coast of st. thomas, virgin islands. and i must say it was amazing. all those fish and underwater creatures were incredible. another thing i discovered in my under the sea adventure was the specimen known as the sea urchin. it is black and looks a lot like a koosh ball. i was greatly surprised to find out that it is not a koosh ball. instead, it is like a ball made of needles. needles that poke and sting you. i found that i am not a fan of sea urchins.
But, overall, i had a fantastic time and probably gained 10 pounds with all the food they gave us. whatever i wanted, whenever i wanted. it was stellar.
karen got to go with us on the cruise (along with her family). it is really awesome to experience the things we saw with the person you love. i was sooooooo glad she was there. she made the trip so much better. in case you were wondering (which i know you were) this is random simply because i am waiting for something to print at the library. i had nothing better to do, so i thought i would blog a little. so, that's been the insight into bryan's mind for the day.

peace

wow...

2005-11-10T11:44:00.000-08:00

i'm amazed at the goodness of God. it has just been so apparent to me over the last few days that He is sooooo good. i'm getting more and more excited about the wedding. karen played me the song that she will be walking into, and i started crying! i still tear up when i think about it. not only will it be my bride walking down the aisle towards me, it will be a shining example of the excitement and awe that we will experience as the bride of christ on our wedding with the eternal bridegroom. i know that i will be waiting eagerly and excitedly for my beautiful bride to arive. how much more eagerly does Christ await the arrival of his bride...US! what an amazing picture of the glory that waits for those who love Him!!! i'm getting chills...

peace

what had happen wuz...

2005-10-16T21:08:00.000-07:00

The title was the first thing that came to my mind. Isn't it cool how you can look back on something and see God's hand in it, even though you couldn't see it before? I have had a few moments like that in the past couple of days and it's really really cool. It's mind boggling (that's a really fun phrase to say) to see how God works in His oh so mysterious ways. I think it is so funny to me that I'm about to get married to a girl that I would have never met without so many thing falling into a perfect place. And it's even funnier that i met her when I liked another girl. But the LORD knew best and i am marrying "the ONE" and not the other. I've just had a lot of cool "wow, God you're really really cool" moments recently. Most of them have involved the path that has brought me to where i am now. A year and a half ago, i had never even picked up a guitar, and God has opened up the door for me to do something that i'm passionate about (lead worship) without me even seeking it out. I had always said that God was going to have to open those doors and that i would just wait on his timing. It is just so cool to see His faithfulness and His provision. well, i think i'm about all talked out for 11:30, so i'll leave it at that.

peace

2005-09-26T05:49:00.000-07:00

This is a testimony to the heartlessness of the Auburn University Parking patrol. I found this on a car one morning last week. When i saw this, i laughed. i then realized the pain and anguish that these people have on the hardworking students of this university. this has to stop...

making the transition

2005-09-22T07:49:00.000-07:00

well...i finally did it. i quit at hibbett. it's about time, right. well, from here, i don't know where life will take me. i'm excited to see what God has for me. i don't really have much else to say. peace...

An Explanation...

2005-09-05T21:26:00.000-07:00

i've been asked why i chose the title that i did for my blog. well, here's your answer:

I feel as though i am preparing for something, but it is not related to my major. i know that i must finish school in order to get to where i'm going, but i don;t think where i'm going involves my major. this is really confusing to me, because i woild like (at times) to just drop out of school in order to pursue other things that i enjoy, like, say, moving to Seattle and helping out with the desperate need for light in the dark place. But, for noe, i'm stuck in the middle of school and the preparation for whatever it is that i;m being prepared for. so, there you have it. why i'm "here in the middle."

Here we go

2005-08-31T07:52:00.000-07:00

I don't really know what blogging is, but I'm doing it.